Emotionally Spent-Reflections From The Kitchen Sink
I was just emotionally spent
I had attended a funeral visitation for a friend and mentor. Earlier in the day, I had cried more in one sitting than I had for a while. I had a thousand and two things running in my mind: the never-ending list of to do’s, what time the dog was taken out last, the pain in my feet, etc. My head was like one of the old pinball machines in the back of an 1980s arcade with the ball zigging and zagging, bouncing off the bonus bumpers without the gamer even touching the flipper control, but this wasn’t as much fun. I was lulled into that mental monotony when of a sudden, there was a pop as loud as a distant gunshot. Shards of something hit me focusing my attention on the stove and the mess I now had.
A casserole dish I had used literally hundreds of times the last 25ish years had literally exploded on top of my glass-top stove. Instead of turning the back burner on where I had the pot prepped for cooking, I had inadvertently turned on the front burner. Even worse, I had cranked the heat up when I stirred the pot and wasn’t pleased with the warming progress. Holy cow.
Back When I Was Really Emotionally Spent
Back in the day—which to me equates to any time 5-35 years ago—I may have lost it even though there was zero intentional fault obviously nothing that could be done at this point. I was disappointed the dish broke, but it’s a dish. Whatever. I’ve got other dishes. No one was hurt. The broken pieces shot away from the food cooking, so I didn’t have to throw it away. I just had to figure out how to pick up the ceramic chunks that were holding tightly to that almost high heat setting.
Being in a funk, I was just too numb to have my feathers ruffle. I sat down, ate my meal, and had a little moment of reflection. I realized this isn’t the first event that hasn’t rung the crazy doorbell. I think it’s my immersion grief experience. Little stuff just has a really hard time looking big to me now.
Ironically, right after my back patting chill moment, I dropped the spoon in the bbq smokies. I chuckled in my mind, grabbed a larger spoon, and fished the small spoon and a few little smokies out of the pan. “Oh, well” x 2.
I won’t even ask what might be next tonight. I think I better sit down quickly and just call it a day!
…until next time…
Melinda Campbell – All Reflections from the Kitchen Sink posts are written by Melinda Campbell. Melinda is a retired educator who currently focuses her efforts on raising her two teenaged boys, advocating for individuals with special needs and against drunk driving, and serving in her local community. New Kitchen Sink Merchandise-Click Here?
