To Leash, Or Not To Leash? That is the Question.
Over the years I have listened to various opinions about why or why not children should wear child harnesses, or leashes, as they are sometimes called. The people who have opposed and criticized them say that if children are watched closely enough they are not needed. Recently I asked the grandmothers on NanaHood’s Facebook page what they thought about the issue and this is what they had to say.
From Donna, “My youngest son was hell on wheels. He was always on the go and I found it hard to keep up with him. So for his safety and my peace of mind I used a child harness/leash. I did get strange looks and some pretty mean comments like, “Why do you have your child on a leash? He isn’t a dog.” Most of the time I would just go about my business and ignore people. A couple of times I would take a moment and explain that it was to keep my son safe. I think as parents no matter what generation we are from we all feel as if we don’t conform to the so called norm, then we must not be doing the right thing for our child. All children are unique – as parents/grandparents we need to embrace that uniqueness. What works for one child doesn’t always work for another.”
Grandmother Trish said, “With my son (who just turned 28) I had a “harness”. It was cute. Had little ducks on it and said something like keep me close or something like that. It was the best thing ever. He had enough freedom to move around closely without me needing him to have his little arm stretched up to my hand all the time. They were not very common at that time and I did get some disapproving looks but it worked for us. I’m glad you are discussing this topic. I believe if we used different language to talk about it other than leash or harness (that we associate with animals) the conversation would shift.”
I Googled “child leash” and I think Trish is on to something about changing the name. Several companies don’t use the word “leash” at all. I found the term “safety harness” was much more common. Some companies even had names for them without the word harness or leash in the title.
Just Make Them Hold Your Hand
Some grandmothers and moms say, “Just make them hold your hand!” But what if they aren’t hand holders?
Nana Pamela says, “22 years ago when my son was 2 he didn’t want to hold anyone’s hand and it was a struggle to get him into a building safely without a fight. Then I started using the child’s leash and I suddenly had a miracle boy. He was happy and independent (so he thought) and life was much easier. Oh don’t get me wrong, I got some strange looks from people. But it was totally worth it, and now when I see other children on the leash I just think, well there’s a bright, independent little soul!! Keep on leashing on!!”
Lisa says, “ I never used these with my 2 children, but 30 and 35 yrs ago when my kids were small it was a different atmosphere than today….to keep my grand-babies safe, I sure would use a harness. There are so many more people crowded in the malls or public outings that you can’t watch everyone, and with so many children abducted n such, a harness is a good way to make sure they stay within arms reach.“
My Thoughts
My children are grown now and I never used a leash but I probably should have. Our fourth child turned out to be twin boys and with five children under the age of ten, it was very difficult to take them all places. So I didn’t. I would take the older ones and leave the babies with their dad at home, or vice-versa. There were occasions when we took them all at once but we were careful not to let them out of our sight.
Once when we were at Disney Land my husband was in charge of the our 3 year old son. This was before the twins were born. He came running up to me totally freaked out and yelling, “Where is Justin?” I know I looked at him like he was crazy. Justin was riding on his dad’s shoulders but he’d been up there so long Bill had forgotten. I think a leash would have been a great thing to have that trip!
Your Thoughts
You’ve heard from some nanas and myself, now let me know your thoughts. Agree? Disagree? Let us know!
I so agree! I had rather take some criticism about a harness than lose a child!
Thirty years ago I would have been one of those parents that were disapproving of using a harness on your kids. But, then my 2 1/2 year old granddaughter came along. She makes the Energizer Bunny look like a slacker. She can be resistant (stubborn) at times to holding a hand and she wants to run and explore. So I vote for doing whatever is needed to keep them safe. If it works for you, then do it.