My Top 6 Funniest Church Moments

Why is it when you are supposed to be serious and something funny happens the urge to laugh can overwhelm you?  In my life this usually happens at church.

We attend a small rural congregation and over the years some pretty funny things have happened.  Here are my Top 6  Funniest Ever Church Moments.

6. Two Sundays ago one of our elders decided to run some warm water in the baptistry. Suddenly our minister suddenly jump up and run to the back of the building. The water had been left on and it was within inches of gushing over the top!  One of our quick thinking members opened the door of the baptistry, got down on his stomach, leaned over, stuck his head under the water and unplugged the drain. Just as he was doing this his daughter, her husband and grandchild came in the door (they were just a tad late to service and thus had no idea what was going on). The son-in-law looks at his wife and says, “Why is your dad upside down in the baptistry?”  The water had flooded the basement and it took several wet-vacs and some cleaning but it was a good Sunday for Noah and the Ark stories!

5. When our one of our sons was about 4 or 5 years old we were in church and during prayer he was doing something he wasn’t supposed to do. I told him to stop it and he didn’t appreciate being told what to do (still doesn’t) anyway, he looked at me, narrowed his little blue eyes and said loudly, “You know what mommy, the next time you are in the bathroom and need toilet paper I am NOT going to get it for you!”

4. One night my brother was leading a prayer at our evening service and he was holding his young son in his arms. Price was about 2 years old and when my brother started talking strangely I opened my eyes to see what was wrong with him. Price had one pudgy finger stuck up my brother’s nose! My brother would remove it and he’d stick it right back!

3. Our twins and my brother’s boys were very close in age. We live in the country and when we potty trained them we did so by letting them water the grass, flowers, etc. Anything to get rid of diapers! One Sunday the boys got out of the church building before we did and when we walked outside all four of them were lined up having a “Who can pee the farthest contest.” We were embarrassed but they weren’t!

2. Elastic skirts are great for the waist line but not so great if you step onthe hem and then stand up for a song at church. A lady two rows in front of me did this one Sunday and unbeknownst to her, her whole rear end was showing! The good news is she had a slip on. The bad news is everyone sitting behind her totally lost all attempts at self control. My husband was leading the singing and was convinced his pants zipper was unzipped. The lady whose skirt was at her knees had no idea anything was wrong until her husband saw what had happened and attempted to yank her skirt up. Not knowing what he was doing, she swatted at him and the skirt fight ensued. This event and the next one can still make me laugh even though it’s been years since they happened.

And the funniest moment ever was when….

1. An older lady at our church brought a close friend with her to visit. Miss Holly was a prim and proper lady with perfectly styled and teased hair. She wore a frilly, lacy dress and high heels. During the service she asked where the bathroom was and she went to the back of the building. Suddenly we heard a loud splash. Miss Holly had opened the wrong door and walked off into the baptistry! Thankfully she wasn’t hurt , but the visual picture of her soaked to the bone with her pretty poofed hair matted to her head is one I will never, ever forget. By the way, she was a good sport and laughed at herself too!