Pink Ladies, Parking, and other Problems

I am in the process of signing up to be a Pink Lady. That sounds like a cocktail or something, but that’s not what it is. Volunteers at the local hospital are called Pink Ladies because they wear pink jackets. Personally, I prefer purple, but no one asked me.

To be a Pink Lady you have to have a TB skin test, which I haven’t found time to do yet. You have to take a written or online test, which I haven’t found time to do yet. Then they do a background check, make your picture and if you haven’t robbed a bank or something, you get a pink jacket and a name badge. Unfortunately, as you can tell, I haven’t found the time to do anything except go in and fill out the application. Hey, that’s one small step for volunteerism, one giant leap for a future Pink Lady.

I started the paper work about a week ago and yesterday someone called me from the hospital, probably to see if I’d changed my mind or moved out of state.

“I’m going to take the test and get the TB skin check soon,” I promised. But I’m not sure how soon is soon. Which makes me wonder how good a volunteer I’m going to be if I can’t find the time to do the paper work.

Is everyone else s life in 5th gear, or am I speeding down the highway of life by myself? Speaking of speeding, that reminds me of the background check. I hate those things. The powers that be send copies of every speeding ticket you’ve ever had and it takes a shoe box to hold all mine.

Yes, this nana was a speed demon. WAS. In my younger days I went to traffic school, again and again and again. (I’m a slow learner) but I’m glad to say that I am reformed! I haven’t had a ticket in over three years! Why the state department insists on keeping all my past mistakes on the record is beyond me.

While I have slowed down on the highway, I still have work to do when it comes to parking. Not long ago I ran to the Dollar General for something and came back outside to find a note on my windshield. I thought someone was trying to sell me something but that wasn’t the case.

“You need someone to give you parking lessons! I couldn’t get my baby out of the car because you had my door blocked! You are a beep-beeping beep!”

I think she was ticked.

Then today I went to the grocery. When I came out I saw someone staring at my van. When they saw me looking at them they turned their back and went into the store. I walked around my van to see what they were staring at. “Did I leave my bra on the rear bumper again?” I wondered (yes, I did that. The thing was driving me crazy so I unhooked it, slid it through an arm hole of my shirt and placed it on my bumper…then I drove to the grocery and the stupid thing didn’t fall off. You should have seen the look on the young man’s face that loaded my groceries in the van.)

Anyway, it didn’t take me long to see what the person was staring at.

In fairness to me the lines were really faded and I didn’t have my glasses on and the sun was in my eyes and….