What do you want read or said at your funeral?

This week I read an article that was extremely thought provoking. The article was called, “Are you living your eulogy or your resume?” and it was written by Arianna Huffington. The article made some excellent points.

Point number one...

“It’s easy to let ourselves get consumed by our work. It’s easy to use work to let ourselves forget the things and the people that truly sustain us. It’s easy to let technology wrap us in a perpetually harried, stressed-out existence. It’s easy, in effect, to miss our lives even while we’re living them. Until we’re no longer living them.”

Ever sit at a restaurant and watch people having dinner text or talk on their cell phones? Have you ever been to a funeral, church service, wedding or graduation and seen people talking, whispering, texting?  We didn’t have cell phones when I was a teenager and I’m so thankful we didn’t, they definitely hinder the ability to live in the moment.

Point number two…

The article talks about what we don’t hear mentioned at funerals. Things like-

“He was proud that he never made it to one of his kid’s Little League games because he always wanted to go over those figures one more time.”

Or:

“She didn’t have any real friends, but she had 600 Facebook friends, and she dealt with every email in her inbox every night.”

The first one about Little League doesn’t apply to me, I made it to every game all five children participated in 99.9 % of the time, but while attending those games I noticed the parents who were absent more often than not. I also noticed some who were there physically but not mentally. There was one mom who talked on the cell phone, talked to people around her, talked to anyone who would listen and as a result she rarely knew what was going on int he game or saw the “big” plays her son made.

While I might not be guilty of missing ballgames the Facebook statement hit me pretty hard.

I love scrolling through Facebook and seeing what everyone is up to (my sons call it creeping). I read and respond to a ton of email. When I stopped to think about the time I spend on Facebook and checking email I couldn’t help but wonder if my time could be better spent. What if instead of typing a quick IM or email to someone who is sick or sad, I mailed them a handwritten note or a thoughtful card I chose just for them? Or what if I got in my car and went to see them?

Real, meaningful friendships are much more than short status updates on a computer screen.

 Point number three…

The article pondered the reasons why we spend so much time, effort and energy on those résumé entries, which are gone as soon our heart stops beating? Even for those who die with amazing résumés, whose lives were synonymous with accomplishment and achievement, their eulogies are mostly about what they did when they weren’t achieving and succeeding.

Erma Bombeck, a writer and humorist, had some great advice about how to live your life (not your resume) you might want to read it one more time.

If I Had My Life to Live Over

by Erma Bombeck

I would have talked less and listened more.

I would have invited friends over to dinner even if the carpet was stained, or the sofa faded.

I would have eaten the popcorn in the ‘good’ living room and worried much less about the dirt when someone wanted to light a fire in the fireplace.

If I had my life to live over, I would have taken the time to listen to my grandfather ramble about his youth.

I would never have insisted the car windows be rolled up on a summer day because my hair had just been teased and sprayed.

I would have burned the pink candle sculpted like a rose before it melted in storage.

I would have sat on the lawn with my children and not worried about grass stains.

I would have cried and laughed less while watching television-and more while watching life.

If I had my life to live over, I would have shared more of the responsibility carried by my husband.

I would have gone to bed when I was sick instead of pretending the earth would go into a holding pattern if I weren’t there for the day.

I would never have bought anything just because it was practical, wouldn’t show soil, or was guaranteed to last a lifetime.

Instead of wishing away nine months of pregnancy, I’d have cherished every moment and realized that the wonderment growing inside me was the only chance in life to assist God in a miracle.

If I had my life to live over, when my kids kissed me impetuously, I would never have said, “Later. Now go get washed up for dinner.”

There would have been more “I love you’s”.. more “I’m sorry’s” ….but mostly, given another shot at life, I would seize every minute…look at it and really see it … live it…and never give it back.

Stop sweating the small stuff. Don’t worry about who doesn’t like you, who has more, or who’s doing what.

Instead, let’s cherish the relationships we have with those who Do love us.

Let’s think about what God HAS blessed us with.

We are only here a short time. No one wants their resume read at their funeral.

Let’s do our best to live our eulogy every day.

What are your goals tied to?