The Ten Commandments of Health

I received two things in the mail this week that caught my interest long enough to keep them from going into file 13. One was an email from someone wanting to advertise compression hose on NanaHood. Ugh, did that make me feel old! My grandmother wore them, but she was in her 80s. I’m only in my 50s!

I thought about writing him back and telling him that I hate the words “compression” and “hose”, when you put those two words together, I really hate them. When I was younger I loved having a tan and never wore hose because I didn’t need too. Over the years I developed a strong aversion to hose. They felt like they were suffocating me. The only time I wore them was when I absolutely had to (weddings and funerals) and even then I sometimes wore pants to avoid the misery of panty hose.

The word “compression” is even worse. When my daughter married I decided my mid-section needed some compression. I remembered the girdles my mother wore and went in search of something similar. I learned that they were no longer called girdles, but now they are refered to as “shapewear.”

They also come in varying degrees of intensity. The first pair I bought didn’t do much so I bought a second pair. This one worked. It mashed my innards into at least a 5 pound difference! Yes! I exclaimed as I pumped my fist like a quarterback who had just kicked the winning field goal! I’m skinnier!

Of course there was a down side. I couldn’t bend over. If I dropped anything it would have to stay on the ground. Sitting wasn’t easy either. It sort of took my breath away, but if anyone noticed the fact that my face was red and I was short of breath they thought it was because of the emotion of the moment. It wasn’t. I couldn’t breathe.

After the wedding I put the “sucker upper” as I called it, in my drawer and forgot about it. Fast forward three years and ten additional pounds. We are invited to a Christmas party and I want to look thinner. I remember the torture devise in my underwear drawer and go and get it. After 30 minutes and lots of grunting, I get the thing on. We go to the Christmas party and I enjoyed the food but I felt like I might explode (literally) at any minute. As soon as the dinner is over we go out to the car. I tell my husband to wait just a minute. It’s dark outside and there’s no one around. I peel the painful “sucker up” off of me with great difficulty-it was super-glued to my skin, but I do it.

My huband is laughing hysterically. “Drive” I order. He knows better than to argue with me when I’m sweating in December. He does and I roll the window down. “Bye-bye evil girdle,” I say and throw it out the window.

If you find it (somewhere on Natcher Parkway in Kentucky) and you weigh over 150 pounds, don’t bother trying it on. The thing is miserable!

Back to my orginal story and the other piece of interesting mail I mentioned. I get an AARPbulletin. It’s always full of interesting stories and no, it doesn’t bother me to get it in the mail. The mail man and I went to school together. He knows how old I am. Anyway, in the bulletin the editor talks about George W. Calver who developed the 10 Commandments of Health. Calver was the first appointed doctor for Congress. The year was 1928 and at that time senators and representatives were dying at the rate of 20 a year.

To help lower that number and improve their health Calver wrote the commandments on cards and gave one to each member of Congress.  Here are the commandments;

Eat wisely

Drink plentifully (water)

Eliminate thoroughly

Bathe cleanly

Exercise rationally

Accept inevitables (don’t worry)

Play enthusiastically

Relax completely

Sleep sufficiently

Check up occasionally. (Give 5% of your time to keeping well. You won’t have to give 100% getting over being sick.)

Seems like common sense, doesn’t it? But think about it. The editor of AARP says, “four diseases associated with obesity and smoking-diabetes, hypertension, heart disease and stroke-today coast $238 billion a year. Seventy percent of the nation is regarded as overweight.” He goes on to quote the Urban Institute who predicts that the rapid increase of these conditions will add another $466 billion to the toal coast by 2030 (without inflation!)

There are health problems that I may face that I have no control over, but the ones that I do, (like the extra ten pounds I have gained the last few years) I need to do something about and I REFUSE to buy another girdle!

Yesterday I walked to the end of the road (about one mile) and back. I’m going to do it again today and the next and the next. I am not going to use the exuse that it’s cold or raining or snowing. I am going to walk.

What are you doing for your 5% of time to keep well? Do you walk? Do you exercise? Whatever it is that you need to do or stop doing, Do It.

My Grandmother was fond of saying, “An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.”

She was right.

 

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