Reflections from the Kitchen Sink on Impasse

Disclaimer: Melinda offers this shirt for sale but all thoughts and opinions are hers! FYI-I concur with her sentiment!

Anyone who’s a parent has been there: the near impasse…you know, the time during which your glare has to outlast that of your child. There your child sits like a disgruntled worker on strike minus the picket sign. Mediation isn’t an option. The company CEO—you—has to buckle down or surrender to the demands. It can be precarious to say the least.

For widowed parents and others in the solo realm, these moments can be extra trying. You have to hold the line even when you’re tired, and exhaustion is just part of life. Some people seem to manage it with such grace and resilience: I’m not one of those people. I may appear all Bertha Bad Butt, but inside my heart flutters with insecurity so often. 

When my husband was alive, I was the parent with more kid time due to the nature of his job. I was the one who managed almost all the daily routine things: household demands, school and extracurricular activities, medical appointments, etc. With those responsibilities came the bad cop role quite often. I had to be the heavy because I was the one on the frontline. It was beyond frustrating sometimes, but I dealt with it. 

There are so many things I miss about my companion, but one is his swooping in and providing a quick break or word of encouragement. Sometimes, he was like a kid coming off the end of the bench closing down the game’s victory, but even the few minutes to regroup were welcomed and appreciated ones. Those moments reminded our boys that their dad and I were unified on goals and expectations, and that really mattered.

On the most trying days now, I hear myself saying phrases like “your dad expected (this or that)” and hoping the boys remember enough to know what I’m saying is true. It can truly be overwhelming to hold to high standards of behavior when the tiredness could easily persuade you to bend, but I pray each and every day for enough strength to hold it together and push to the finish of the race maintaining our family’s vision. 

I recently had a shirt made that has brought quite a bit of laughter to moms and dads everywhere: “Thou shalt not try me. Mood 24:7.” I jokingly make similar statements to my boys daily, but I got this shirt made to remind myself of the responsibility to stand firm with things. You all know me well enough to know I’m the soft, nostalgic type. I long for the Mayberry-ish respect and dignity promoted in society way back when. Even when I’m tired, I need to keep my eyes on the prize of sending equipped men into this crazy culture of ours, men ready to engage life with standards of strong integrity and a commitment to excellence. To do that, I can’t fold. I’m praying a little extra for other solo parents today. Know that while you might not have someone literally at your back supporting you, you’re not alone on the journey. 

…until next time…

impasse

P.S.
This shirt design is the latest addition to the Sink store! Go check it out at
http://Stores.morrispromo.com/reflections_from_the_kitchen_si/shop/home

Bio-Melinda Campbell is a retired educator who currently focuses her efforts on raising her two teenaged boys, advocating for individuals with special needs and against drunk driving, and serving in her local community. Melinda has been gaining recognition for her writings labeled “Reflections from my Kitchen Sink” since the tragic death of her husband Michael in 2015. In her stories, she shares observations from her daily life including moments she has as a solo parent, a widow, and a woman who battles significant health issues including fibromyalgia and depression. BIG ANNOUNCEMENT- New Kitchen Sink Merchandise-Click Here?

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